Saturday, August 15, 2020
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A Dad’s Life: Worries

We're so excited to welcome you to the first edition of our newest monthly blog – A Dad's Life.  It's written by dads, for dads and will cover everything from diaper changes to sports and technology. Thanks to our newest guest blogger and local dad, Michael Cusden for kicking it off with his dad worries.

Are you a parent who worries? Does the cannon go boom every day at noon?

Yes, of course you worry if you are a parent. Let's stop with the silly questions.

I want to share with you what worries me as a dad. Don't worry, no tales of an empty beer fridge or a stinky diaper. Just honest worries that run through my mind.

From talking to other parents, there seem to be anywhere from 0-678 things that worry us every day. We all want to raise our kids to be good people and that is stressful and hard to manage. But to be honest, those worries are part of what I signed up for. My parents worried about raising me and now the torch has been passed on.

So, what truly worries me as a dad?

Instead of listing all 678 items, I will just touch on a few that most likely have crossed your mind while you lay awake at night listening to your white noise machine (snoring spouse).

Like father like kid
Does your kid say "well I saw dad do it?"

Yep, busted. I worry that my actions or lack there of, will influence and steer my boys into thinking the way dad does something is the right way to do it. Kids are pretty impressionable and if they see it coming from the people they trust most, of course they are going to mimic it. For example, in our house, sometimes we yell at the cat or dog for doing something wrong. No big deal right? Then a week later, you hear your 3-year old yelling at the pets in the same way even if they did not do anything wrong. Not good.

I worry that my lack of eating certain foods will influence our kids into not liking those same foods. I worry that my laid back approach in social settings will hinder our boys from being social. Hell, I already worry that my shortcomings in math and science will limit what our boys are good at in school. They can always blog right?

Money, money, money

Shocking I know. I worry about money. In these tough economic times, I worry about how we are going to be able to provide our kids with everything they need. My wife and I bring home above average wages, but it seems we are always being stretched thin. How did my parents do it? Will we be able to let our kids experience everything they want to in life or will we have to say no because of our bank accounts? I used to worry about money for myself and my wife, now it is mostly about the kids and their future.

What I can't worry about
I try my best to not worry about the little things you can't control. I can't worry about whether our son eats his vegetable at school. He will one day. I can't worry about if our 3-year old son is showing enough interest in sports. It will happen. I can't worry about what could or could not happen one day because there is so much that needs attention now.

I grew up with a Mum who worried 24 hours a day and I always wondered how she stayed sane. Now that I am a parent, I get it. But at the end of the day, you can only control so much, which makes it important to remember to enjoy being a parent. I think Bobby McFerrin said it best right? "Don't worry, be happy".

Michael is a marketing manager by day, who has been at the blogging thing for almost a decade. Father of two, husband to one and griller to the Gods. Read more about his parental adventures, including his current stint on parental leave on his blog, Like A Dad.